I have avoided this subject because, well it is very painful. And scary. And the one thing that could very well break me. My boys. My sons. My sweet, innocent, loving boys. Divorce. Combine them and it hurts. Their dad and I are united in raising them together. Right now, we agree on how we … More I am sharing my children with another woman
Sunday wasn’t the best day for our little family. April was pretending to be January. My children thought 6:30 am was a good time to play, shout, and wrestle on my bed. I was (and still am) in limbo with my medication transition and my sleep, patience, and nerves were lacking. My four year old … More A bad Sunday doesn’t make me a bad mom
“Katie, I don’t want you to kill yourself.” My friend called me earlier this week and wanted to hear herself how I was doing. She knows I am knee deep in depression and I am transitioning to new medication. She wanted me to know that she is here for me whether it be 2 pm … More My depression reality
Surviving. Living. Thriving. Blooming. Words that I have used to describe myself in the past two years. But there is another one that is very prevalent. Daring. I have never really liked this word. Before, I would have never played truth or dare. It was too iffy, too vulnerable, too risky. I didn’t like risky. … More Sharing my truths and daring to live
Oh the time has come. I knew it would. These past few months just seemed harder. Longer. Darker. I chalked it up to Seasonal Affective Disorder. I prepared and tackled. I used all my tricks up my sleeve. Yet, here I am at the end of March still drifting aimlessly. I admitted it even. I … More I am fighting for myself and changing my medication
On March 14th, I got this idea for a little micro blog. I grabbed my camera, took the pic, went off to work. Right before my lunch break, I had a few minutes and I wrote. I wrote about my daily medication I take for my depression with anxiety. I stated I wasn’t ashamed and … More Going viral: The good, the bad, the ugly
The darkness makes me believe that it will never get better. Every time. When the darkness lasts for a day, a week, a month, a year. I am tricked into believing and accepting this is permanent. Winter is never going to end. The cold never changing. The days will be gloomy, gray, and long forever. … More Spring will always arrive as does the light
I knew motherhood was going to be hard. I read about it. I heard about it. I saw it. All around me. I prepared myself as best as possible and then I was going to just learn as I go. Today, I am still winging it. More now than in the past six years. I … More Loving my strong willed child
The other night in a conversation with a friend, she mentioned a time pre-cancer for her. I said, oh before I knew you. You wouldn’t have been friends with me pre-divorce. She laughed. No, I am serious and it would have been because of me. She chuckles but I was being honest. My friend only … More Believe me when I say I have changed
The pressure has been building. Slowly. Slipping in. The reality of my life. Divorce. Single mom. Sole responsibility. Winter. Depression. I guess I thought it would be easier now. Two years in. The pain more a dull throb than a hot intense burn. The hard doesn’t reflect how it was in the beginning. But it … More A pleading prayer from my weary heart
