Today is the day. You have been waiting for this. It is all you want to talk about. School. Kindergarten. We had your outfit already picked out. We bought all the school supplies. We visited your class room. It’s the big day!
You are ready. I am ready. But last night, I held you a little longer. A little closer. I kissed your cheek as you slept. What I want to say to you, you would not understand. You are only almost 6. I know life isn’t always sparkles and glitter. You and I know how unfair it can be. But I still have some hopes and dreams for you. I want you to know that you can always count on me to be your constant.
I hope that when you walk into your classroom, you are filled with the wonder and awe. Of all the possibilities before you.
I hope you make an instant friend. Someone who will make you feel a little less nervous and not so alone. And if you don’t, your brother and I will be waiting for you when you come home. Always know you have a friend at home with us.
I hope you don’t lose your big personality. You are stubborn, willful, funny, challenging, kind, loud, and pretty great. Sometimes we have to conform to rules and society. We have to be part of a team and a class. When this happens, a person might lose what makes them special. What makes them shine brighter. Don’t lose it. Keep being you. But, please do listen to the teacher.
I hope you don’t miss me. Cause I will be missing you for both of us. You see my son, you are my heart. I formed you inside of me and because of that whenever you are away from me, a part of me is missing.
I hope you have fun. Because being a kid is fun. I don’t want you to take the worries and stresses of life on your shoulders. That is Mommy’s job. So be free. Be wild. Be crazy. Play. Dance. Run. Jump. Skip. Don’t think about what is going to happen tomorrow or next month. I will do that for you.
I hope you don’t lose your innocence too quickly. See, I know that as soon as you hang out with other kids, you are going to be exposed to so much more. You will know new words and phrases. You will want to have the same toys as them, watch the same TV shows as them, and play the same video games as them. However, your Momma wants you to love Paw Patrol and Daniel Tiger for just a little longer.
I hope you eat your lunch. All of it and not waste the time talking. You get hangry. And I really don’t want your teacher to see you at your finest on the first day. Let’s wait until at least a few weeks in.
I hope you want to do it all over again tomorrow. And the next day. And the next week. The opportunities are endless for you in where the future will take you. However, I am going to make you go to school. Thirteen years and college. So I need you to like school.
I hope when I pick you up today you run into my arms. You run to me with the biggest smile on your face. You are talking so fast about all the wonderful, amazing, and cool things you got to do in Kindergarten. I will hug you. I will kiss you. I will say I love you. I will hold you when the tired overtakes you and you melt down. I will carry you to your bed and read you a bedtime story. I will watch you as you fall asleep. I will remember the big headed early arrival baby that they put on my chest and I held and cried. I will fall in love with you all over again.
My dearest son. My T. I love you. I am just as excited for today as you. But if Mommy cries after dropping you off, isn’t because I am sad. It is because I am so proud of you. I am so happy for you. I am so in love with you. You are my lovely. My light. My heart.